Simple Rules of Friendship
by jbezzy2easy
Summary: Damon is really taking his friendship with Bonnie seriously…maybe a little too seriously. So she has to set a few simple rules.


**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

 **A/N: This is for Catrice. She has no social networks, but if you guys like this story, send her some happy birthday wishes in the comments please.**

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"Is this really necessary?" Bonnie asks from her position on the plush sofa, her eyebrows perfect and questioning.

"Would we be doing it, if it weren't?" Damon responds, sifting through the handful of DVDs currently in his possession.

She thinks over the question only for a moment before saying, "See I kind of feel like the answer to that is yes. A resounding yes."

Damon isn't looking at her when he replies, "well best friend job duties state that you have to humor me even if it isn't." After a few moments consisting of some serious brow furrowing, he walks over to her, hoarding the collection of discs. A level of brooding even his younger brother would appreciate, overwhelming his facial expression when he finally says, "now for your witchy viewing pleasure we have the _Craft_ , _Hocus Pocus_ , and _American Horror Story: Coven_. Obviously we can't watch all of them in one night, but I used Stefan's card to rent them so we can take as long as we need."

Bonnie sighs audibly.

 _Sure, she should be happy._ At least he wasn't coping with his usual vices of blood and bourbon. But his current mechanism, wasn't that much healthier. Since he'd left his binge drinking behind in Amsterdam, Damon had developed an obsessive appreciation for domestic relationship activities. Things like Saturday shopping at Target for decorative pillow shams. Sunday brunch with cronuts and mimosas. And most recently Friday themed movie nights. And while most women would cherish such behavior…Bonnie didn't.

No, she was smart enough to realize that Damon had begun doing all the couples' things that he had enjoyed with Elena, the problem was, that he was now doing those things with Bonnie.

"Wow. We're having a witch themed movie marathon. You're so clever," she says with a sarcasm laced tone.

"Bon, I'm happy you finally got the courage to admit what we all have always known. I'm both the beauty and the brains of this partnership."

"And so humble too."

"Quiet down. I could easily replace you with Stefan…although he won't be as fun to snuggle with."

He muses over the latter part of his statement to himself. While Bonnie chokes on air trying to process what he just said. _Snuggling?_

"Okay. Well let's just find the phone then proceed to hold it."

"Really Bennett can't you…" he begins, but is interrupted by Bonnie jumping from the couch to shout, "Hold the damn phone Damon! Who said anything about snuggling?! I didn't agree to any snuggling. And that's definitely not in the job description."

"It's in the best friend's handbook. You can't go against the handbook," he explains.

"Stop lying. There is no handbook. And we aren't snuggling."

And they weren't. She couldn't let this situation get _that_ out of hand. There needed to be rules. Boundaries even. Sure, she could fill in for Elena on shopping trips, at meals, but not for late night couch snuggling. _No way_. That would cross a line. And Bonnie Bennett was not a crosser of lines.

"Everyone knows that the only reason to have movie night is so that you can snuggle. That's basically why it was invented. Gee, Bon you really ought to know this," he smirks, his bright eyes dancing with mirth.

 _That'_ s problem. Objectively speaking, Damon was hot, even more so when he unleashed the trademark uptick of his lips. And everyone in the world knows snuggling with a hot guy is dangerous territory. Especially when that guy was a self-proclaimed stud who notoriously fell victim to his own libido.

She had to fix this.

"How about instead of movie night, we go out and get drunk. I'll buy the first round maybe even the second. Because as frighteningly adorable this whole thing is, it's not you. Or at least it's not who you are with me. Damon this could be categorized as Netflix and chill or technically Red box and chill, either way this is serious girlfriend terrain here. I'm out of my depth. I can't do relationship-y things with you. It's not healthy." She finishes. Chest heaving. Maybe a little bit of her is sad that this part of their relationship is over. Maybe she will miss these things. But it's not right. She knows that much.

Damon seems unfazed by the whole epic speech thing she just did, and doesn't speak. He just puts the DVDs down on the coffee table, freeing his hands.

Bonnie thinks he's going to agree with her. To admit how wrong this all is…probably even thank her for being to one to admit it out loud. But she forgot one big major detail. Even as this version of himself Damon was still _Damon_.

He folds his arms across his chest, gearing up for a verbal battle. "Why can't we do this stuff?"

"I told you…it's not healthy," she responds. _Really?_ She really has to defend herself for trying to do the right thing.

"Health is overrated. What else?"

"Your actual girlfriend?"

"She's magically comatose."

"You know what I mean."

"She encouraged me to move on. So that's what I'm doing. Moving on."

That blow sends Bonnie back onto the couch. Those words resonate. They hit hard. He'd been conscious of his actions the entire time. Wow. "I will not be your emotional girlfriend surrogate," she grounds out finally.

"Before you fight me on this…or use some of your juju to make me see the error of my ways…just…this whole thing kind of works out perfectly. I get all the great things non-sex things about having a girlfriend from you, then if I'm so inclined…which there is some definite inclination…I can get the hot fun stuff from someone else. See perfect. I'm a genius"

"You're a selfish asshole," she says incredulously.

Bonnie grabs her bag and starts walking towards the door.

She had to get out of there. Technically, these were her dorms and she didn't have anywhere else to go. But she also didn't want to hang around. Because at the moment all she could think of were the medieval torture techniques she read about in her World History course. Which didn't bode well for her so-called best friend's favorite appendage.

Damon isn't having it though. He doesn't let her leave. No. He blocks her escape, hands on her shoulders, pressing cool palms onto warm skin. "Bon don't be that way," he says in a voice that bordered pleading.

"Let me go. I'm pissed Damon."

"Look. I would have asked you for sex, but I didn't want to risk the chance that you'd fall in love with me," he grins.

"Urgh. Just go watch movies and snuggle with your inflated ego and leave me be."

She waits but he still doesn't move. He just stares at her expectantly like he's waiting to be let in on the joke. Slowly it dawns that there is no joke. Only an angry witch.

"Okay. Look I know I said something wrong, because you're all pouty and not in the cute way but in the sad way. So how about you save us both the time and the trouble and tell me what it was so I can apologize or fix it or buy you lots of chocolate so you'll forgive me."

Bonnie rolls her eyes briefly, out of habit, before saying, "forget it."

He touches his thumb to her lips, trying to conquer her frown, "then why are you still so pouty?"

"I'm pouty because of you. This whole time you've been using me. Having me be your fake girlfriend. Did you ever think that I'd like to do those things with someone for real? That I deserve to do them with someone and have them be real?" she admits, looking up, her sad eyes overwhelming him. Forcing him away.

So he moves. Clearing her path. But she doesn't leave. Not yet. She knows that sometimes he needs physical space in order to reveal the parts of himself hidden behind bravado and innuendos.

"I know. I know you deserve that. And maybe a nobler me…or a me that was more like Stefan, would want you to have them. It's selfish but I want to keep you to myself. Because you're the best thing about me right now Bonnie. This friendship. And without you…I just…I think I might float away. It doesn't make sense. But there it is."

He doesn't turn. He doesn't come back to her side. So she walks over to him. Placing a hand on his back. Comforting. Before putting her head on his shoulder with a contented sigh.

"I promise I won't let that happen. I won't let you float way. In twenty thousand and however many days, if you need me I'm there."

Damon nods. Accepting her words. Believing in them.

Bonnie clears her throat before continuing. "Unless it's on my wedding day. In which case, you'll have to wait until after the cake is cut."

He smiles down at her. "Just so you know, I won't be giving you pointers on how to please your future husband. No matter how hard you beg," he pronounces.

"I promise I won't beg or ask politely or even continue this conversation." She takes her seat back on the couch, throwing her purse down. "Now start the movie," she orders.

Damon does as he is told. Keying up the remotes, refreshments, and movie. "Are there still strict no snuggling rules in place?" he questions as he joins her on the couch.

Bonnie thinks this over. She knows she shouldn't but they just had a major friendship development. She figures that they both could use a little human…non-human contact. "I guess, I can amend the rules this once," she smiles. He returns her smile. Genuine. Happy.

Lifting his arm, she curls her petite frame against his larger one. Once she is settled he drops his arm around her waist.

The opening credits are playing when he asks, "what about the rules on friendly groping?" Siting up as much as her position would allow, she fixes him with a deathly glare, "don't even think about it Salvatore."

"Can't promise that I won't think about it. In fact, I'm kind of thinking about it right now and in my thoughts you really like friendly groping. It's your favorite."

"I'm seriously considering reinstating the ban on snuggling." She starts to push him away, he pulls her closer to his chest. "I'm sorry. I'll be good," Damon promises.

She believes him only for a moment, then he says "so it's safe to assume that friendly kissing is off the table?"


End file.
